And now, Two A-Holes at a film audition.

So I was at an audition the other day. I won't name the casting director nor the project, but I will say that they were INCREDIBLY behind schedule. It was irritating at first, but I was entertaining myself by alternately texting, Twittering, and reading through a stack of Emmy magazines on the table, so it wasn't that big of a deal. However, though, it is really interesting to see how people handle this kind of thing. While we're all sitting there waiting to be called in, the poor assistant with his clipboard has the unenviable job of coming over to us and saying "Uh, I know you've been here for a while, but--" And that's all you hear/pay attention to because everyone starts groaning, and you know it's not good news anyway.

Anyway, while I'm reading an interview with Mitch Hurwitz and still kind of half-listening for my name perchance it be called ahead of time, I hear this girl say, "You know," with her lips all pursed - ugh, I wanted to smack her a little - "you know, this casting office is always slow, I haaaate coming here. It's such a waste of time."

You know what, chick, with your pursed lips and your knockoff bag and your two-month-old highlights? These underpaid people do not get blue ribbons at the end of their day for making our lives more difficult just for the heck of it. Just cool it.

But then, just as I'm judging this girl for her bitchy attitude, I remember one of my own low moments...

I was on a flight to Australia where we sat on the runway for four and a half hours. And at one point I actually yelled out, very loudly, into a quiet plane packed full of people, "Oh, please! Come on now! Let's go already!" And I know I know I know. That was so rude. But. The plane like, broke or something and then they brought us back to the gate but didn't let us off until they fixed it. And then they sent us back out and proceeded to put us on a runway that they weren't using or something inane like that, AND THEN FORGOT THAT WE WERE OUT THERE! We were waiting forever and once they realized their mistake we had to get back into the line of like 45 planes to take off again. Ugh.

But regardless of all of that, that girl with the bag and the lips should have been right there, right then, to smack me across the face and say "You spoiled little brat. Cool it."

So I guess my long-winded point is that we all get pushed to that point sometimes. And while what comes out isn't always pretty, we need to remember:

1. Don't shoot the messenger
2. Things happen and roll easy
and (my lesson today)
3. People who live in glass houses... shouldn't go into show business.

ODLR Resort 2010

All I know is that this collection totally reminds me of Madeline. And all of a sudden, I want to be an adorable pipsqueak of a boarding school student in 1930s France.

When I grow up I wanna be famous, I wanna be a star, I wanna be in movies.

The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien starts tonight.

I think the technical term for this is booyah.

I love it when the first of the month falls on a Monday. It just feels so right, y'know? This whole month feels like it's shaping up to be a good one. Happy June, my love angels!

In other news, Tina Fey and I ate at the same restaurant the other day. Not at the same time, though. You know what sucks? When you're looking at ONTD and there are pictures of your hero seeing a movie and grabbing a cheeseburger with her adorable family and being all "Um, I just had a turkey burger there this afternoon and all I saw was a hot guy in a Red Sox hat being a douche to the waitress." That is essentially the essence of an FML moment. FML.

This blog entry needs some pointless eye candy. Here we go:


Seth Meyers leaving Letterman in January (Hi, Linda.)

Zachary Quinto


Paul Rudd

And, okay, why not? Jon Hamm and Tina Fey filming 30 Rock earlier this year.

Le sigh.

(PS. Will someone make me stop listening to the Pussycat Dolls? This can't be good for me. My brain is slowly atrophying and turning into mush, like in those Hulu commercials. But it's oh so catchy!)

An entry, oh my!

So, uh, that's me. The days of the red hair have finally come to a permanent end, and I couldn't be happier. So far, reactions to the new color have been overwhelmingly positive. By the numbers: "Your eyes pop!": 9, "You look so much more mature!": 5, "You look like Bella Swan!": 3, "You look like Katy Perry!": 1 (Thanks... Mom.)

I'm currently trying to lose 5 pounds, just for the heck of it. It's going well, and I haven't found myself craving sweets at all lately. (Knock on wood. )

In other news, I'm finally done with my first year of college! Crazy! Where does the time go?!

This is such an ADD entry, really. I could've turned it into a Recent Findings post, but I've found myself craving a little more substance lately (because really, when you think substantial, you think this blog.). So here are a few more random facts about my life as of late:

1. I have developed a certain fondness for rhinestoned Ed Hardy t-shirts. I am trying to convince myself that this is ironic.
2. This summer is going to be a good one, creatively speaking: improv classes at the Upright Citizens Brigade coupled with playing Marcy in Dog Sees God: Confessions of a Teenage Blockhead. The latter is really very exciting for me since this role involves onstage drunkenness, an offstage threesome, and more F-bombs than a Christian Bale rant. Aww... theatre.
3. In other news, I saw Jay Leno driving in Burbank today. He was in a superhero car. If I tell hackneyed Clinton jokes on sorta-late-night TV for fifteen years, can I have a cool car like that too?
4. I have recently developed a bad case of Face Tan. (God only knows how, I don't tan!) It's really annoying and makes me look like I just blended my foundation badly, but it's real! I wonder if putting that Jergens Natural Glow moisturizing self-tanner lotion on my neck would work, or whether I should just tough it out. I'm still baffled as to how I got this way. Maybe it was my recent five-hour beach trip...
5. This:

Genius.

Recent Findings

Song: "Because I'm Awesome" - The Dollyrots
Favorite season: Spring!
Brunch spot: Beverly Hills Hotel
Short film: Maestro (Think Pushing Daisies, only starring Seth Meyers. Scroll down on the link and watch it, dangit!)
Insanity: Swine flu
Current ailment: Ed Hardy flu (feels a lot like a hangover, only you wake up smelling overwhelmingly of cigarettes and Victoria's Secret Lovespell)
HIGH FIVE: Arlen Specter (now can we just seat Al Franken already?)
Accidental awesomeness: Double-renewing my Entertainment Weekly subscription (two more years!)
Novel: Dog Days by Ana Marie Cox (The Devil Wears Prada goes D.C.)
Favorite Twitterers: @anamariecox, @robhuebel, @michaelurie, @azizansari
DVD obsession: Human Giant
Annoyance: Pick Your Five notifications on Facebook
Philosophy: "There's nobody to blame but yourself" (but that's no fun)
Overused punctuation mark: Parentheses (you were thinking it too)

On to the weekend.

Let's go!

Human Giant: Let's Go (w/Patton Oswalt) - watch more funny videos

you can stand under my umbrella ella ella by ♔ COSMOPOLITICS featuring Tibi day dresses

It'll always be perfect, but we didn't get to live it.

My yesterday was completely hellacious. Long story short: drove all over town all day looking for an outfit for an event this week and found nothing; had my car scratched up by a churchgoing Lexus-driving idiot in Toluca Lake; etc. So in lieu of a real entry today (because I'm still looking for something to wear on this stupid red carpet), some lyrics from my current favorite songs:

Sleepwalker - The Wallflowers
Maybe I could be the one they adore
That could be my reputation
It's where I'm from that lets them think I'm a whore
I'm an educated virgin
Sleepwalker, don't be shy
Now don't open your eyes tonight
You'll be the one that defends my life

While I'm dead asleep dreamin'

Naturally - Middle Distance Runner
'Cause lovin' is not something that I find comes to me naturally
But sometimes lovin' is all I can do to keep myself together through the week

Elvis Ain't Dead - Scouting for Girls
But I wish it was me you chose
I wish it was me you chose
I wish it was me you chose
I wish it was me you chose
cause Elvis ain't dead
and you're coming back
cause Elvis ain't dead
and you're coming back

Being Agent 99.

All right. I think it's time for a new style post.

As some of you reading this blog may have garnered, I am an actor. Due to the slow nature of the business as of late, I recently returned to doing theatre in order to stay loose and creatively fulfilled (in addition to taking my normal acting classes, which are a challenge in and of themselves, but that's another story). My latest show, which closed two weeks ago today, was a production of Get Smart, an adaption of the classic 1960s TV show. It was a fantastic production on so many levels - great source material, a very talented cast, a fantastic director, etc. And one
of the elements that I enjoyed most about doing the show were my costumes.

For those of you unfamiliar with Get Smart (or for those of you who have only seen the funny but incomparable 2008 film), The show itself focused on the exploits of CONTROL's Agents 86, Maxwell Smart (played with spot-on comedic relish by the excellent Don Adams) and 99 (Barbara Feldon). For many, Agent 99 was perhaps the ultimate modern career woman of the 1960s, proving that women in high-ranking positions could be both beautiful and capable, and her wardrobe reflected this, consisting primarily of shift dresses and gorgeous skirt-blouse combos. (Since Feldon, a former model, was in fact taller than her costar Adams, 99 was never seen in heels.)

The 2008 movie adaption, which starred Steve Carell and Anne Hathaway as Max and 99, updated the show for its modern setting. The film's wardrobe showcased Hathaway's athletic figure with many a little black dress, while paying homage to the original show with an impressive array of sleek trenches and Chanel bags.

Our production, meanwhile, fell somewhere in the middle. While Feldon and Hathaway both embodied 99 as a leggy brunette, I'm a petite redhead. The director, Michael, did his best to combat the possible fallout from Mel Brooks enthusiasts by outfitting me in classy monochrome shifts (one of them authentically from the 60s - I wish I had decent pictures of it!) and black pumps. I'm a huge appreciator of the 60s and the style it brought, and recently, upon finding this dress during one of my shopping excursions, had to buy it:

Simple, yes. But I can't help thinking that 99 would approve.

They made a statue of us.

We all have our "us-es," you know? The ones that are just us. These are two of my closest us-es. There are friends that when you see them, you feel known. Not in the biblical sense, but in the connected.

If I didn't have my "us", I'd be lost. I know a lot of people. I like a lot of people.

But only a few of them are my center circle - my rocks - my us.

Here are two: Chasidy and Emily.

PS. Sorry for the sporadic nature of my blog posts as of lately. Life's been slightly nutburgers on my end.

PPS. Go see 17 Again, even if Efron flicks aren't your deal. One of my friends has a pretty substantial role in it, and Hunter Parrish is a dreamboat in his own right.

Recipe for success?

If I could write like
act like
talk politics like
and look like
I'm pretty sure I'd be the happiest person on the face of the earth.


But something else would probably suck instead, so oh well.

Yahoo!

This is an article written by Jon Carroll:
See it at http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/2005/04/08/DDG27BCFLG1.DTL

The following is the first communique from a group calling itself Unitarian Jihad. It was sent to me at The Chronicle via an anonymous spam remailer. I have no idea whether other news organizations have received this communique, and, if so, why they have not chosen to print it. Perhaps they fear starting a panic. I feel strongly that the truth, no matter how alarming, trivial or disgusting, must always be told. I am pleased to report that the words below are at least not disgusting:

Greetings to the Imprisoned Citizens of the United States. We are Unitarian Jihad. There is only God, unless there is more than one God. The vote of our God subcommittee is 10-8 in favor of one God, with two abstentions. Brother Flaming Sword of Moderation noted the possibility of there being no God at all, and his objection was noted with love by the secretary.

Greetings to the Imprisoned Citizens of the United States! Too long has your attention been waylaid by the bright baubles of extremist thought. Too long have fundamentalist yahoos of all religions (except Buddhism -- 14-5 vote, no abstentions, fundamentalism subcommittee) made your head hurt. Too long have you been buffeted by angry people who think that God talks to them. You have a right to your moderation! You have the power to be calm! We will use the IED of truth to explode the SUV of dogmatic expression!

People of the United States, why is everyone yelling at you??? Whatever happened to ... you know, everything? Why is the news dominated by nutballs saying that the Ten Commandments have to be tattooed inside the eyelids of every American, or that Allah has told them to kill Americans in order to rid the world of Satan, or that Yahweh has instructed them to go live wherever they feel like, or that Shiva thinks bombing mosques is a great idea? Sister Immaculate Dagger of Peace notes for the record that we mean no disrespect to Jews, Muslims, Christians or Hindus. Referred back to the committee of the whole for further discussion.

We are Unitarian Jihad. We are everywhere. We have not been born again, nor have we sworn a blood oath. We do not think that God cares what we read, what we eat or whom we sleep with. Brother Neutron Bomb of Serenity notes for the record that he does not have a moral code but is nevertheless a good person, and Unexalted Leader Garrote of Forgiveness stipulates that Brother Neutron Bomb of Serenity is a good person, and this is to be reflected in the minutes.

Beware! Unless you people shut up and begin acting like grown-ups with brains enough to understand the difference between political belief and personal faith, the Unitarian Jihad will begin a series of terrorist-like actions. We will take over television studios, kidnap so-called commentators and broadcast calm, well-reasoned discussions of the issues of the day. We will not try for "balance" by hiring fruitcakes; we will try for balance by hiring non-ideologues who have carefully thought through the issues.

We are Unitarian Jihad. We will appear in public places and require people to shake hands with each other. (Sister Hand Grenade of Love suggested that we institute a terror regime of mandatory hugging, but her motion was not formally introduced because of lack of a quorum.) We will require all lobbyists, spokesmen and campaign managers to dress like trout in public. Televangelists will be forced to take jobs as Xerox repair specialists. Demagogues of all stripes will be required to read Proust out loud in prisons.

We are Unitarian Jihad, and our motto is: "Sincerity is not enough." We have heard from enough sincere people to last a lifetime already. Just because you believe it's true doesn't make it true. Just because your motives are pure doesn't mean you are not doing harm. Get a dog, or comfort someone in a nursing home, or just feed the birds in the park. Play basketball. Lighten up. The world is not out to get you, except in the sense that the world is out to get everyone.

Brother Gatling Gun of Patience notes that he's pretty sure the world is out to get him because everyone laughs when he says he is a Unitarian. There were murmurs of assent around the room, and someone suggested that we buy some Congress members and really stick it to the Baptists. But this was deemed against Revolutionary Principles, and Brother Gatling Gun of Patience was remanded to the Sunday Flowers and Banners committee.

People of the United States! We are Unitarian Jihad! We can strike without warning. Pockets of reasonableness and harmony will appear as if from nowhere! Nice people will run the government again! There will be coffee and cookies in the Gandhi Room after the revolution. Startling new underground group spreads lack of panic! Citizens declare themselves "relatively unafraid" of threats of undeclared rationality. People can still go to France, terrorist leader says.

Michael row the boat ashore, and then get some of the local kids to pull the boat onto the dock, and come visit with jcarroll@sfchronicle.com.

(Photo from http://www.flickr.com/photos/allyjoys/)

Hey life, you can suckit

Things of which I am officially sick:

1. Statistics
2. Learning lines
3. Listening to my friends bitch about Lent
3a. Especially because those friends are not particularly religious in the first place (Jesus sees all the pot you smoke)
4. The LAPD's traffic crackdown of late... I walked out of an audition the other day and a meter maid was literally standing right beside my meter, waiting for it to run out
5. Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (more like Late Night with Buster Bluth)
6. Just about everything else

Recent Findings

MOVIE: Watchmen
BOOK: History Lesson for Girls, by Aurelie Sheehan
IMPRESSION TO WORK ON: Leona Lewis
SONG: Somebody to Love - Jefferson Airplane
BAND: Better than Ezra
ALBUM: Songs from an Unmade Bed - Michael Winther
DRINK: Pomegranate Izze
ANNOYANCE: Coffee-induced burns on my tongue
RED VELVET CUPCAKE: Sprinkles
WEEKENDLY ACTIVITY: ASSSCAT at Upright Citizens Brigade
VIEW: Flowers!
NEXT JEWELRY PURCHASE:

Did your heart break enough this time?

I am not an emotional person by any means. I don't crave danger, I don't like crying, and I am pretty much completely emotionally inept when it comes to relationships. For most of my life, this has been a problem for me. I can't give good relationship advice ("Oh, you have a crush on him? Really? Okay, good. I'll be back in an hour.") and I have never had a boyfriend who lasted more than three months.

This past fall, I met a guy. For the first time, I really connected with someone. He was, by all accounts, really cute. We shared likes and dislikes (Likes: Chopin and SNL digital shorts. Dislikes: Prop 8 yard signs and the slutty scene girls who seemed to constantly request him on Myspace.) and even had a few of the same problems (which I won't go into here). We nursed a mutual crush on each other for a couple months, cuddled at Disneyland in what I'm sure was the most obnoxious way our other friends had ever seen, and finally had a big romantic moment backstage during our one shared bit of downtime during the play we were starring in. He kissed me, whispered "Will you be my girlfriend?" I said yes. He ran onstage and I could see tiny bits of glitter from my makeup clinging to his skin (I was playing a really glittery character, okay?). My best friend was in the audience that night, and after the show I told her what had happened. We squealed and flapped our hands together and had a rather teenage girlish moment. I was really, really happy. But after that night, things were awkward, and I couldn't quite place my finger on the reason why.

There's glitter in my hair
from when you said you loved me
For all of my playing hard-to-want
you still saw something in me

I can't let myself fall for you and prove my mother right.
I don't do heartbreak, I take precautions.
I may have wanted you before
but now I can't stop picking you apart.

You're too loud,
You're a mess, just like me.
You're not so eloquent and you're far too gullible.

Part of me wants to want you, but I can't.

I have closure.

We went on a few dates after the show closed, but we just couldn't make it work. I don't mean to say it was entirely his fault - although it partially was. I had to make an effort just to get him to talk to me. One day, while jogging, a guy came off his porch and mentioned that he had seen me run by every day and always thought that I was cute, and was I single? It was a little creepy, and when I posted a Facebook status update laughing about it, I got an immediate text from the boyfriendish: "Movies tonight? :)" It was confusing, and frankly, a little exhausting.

We fell apart around December, and while he found another girl to post endless ambiguous "OMG I LIKE HER SO MUCH" song lyrics about quite quickly, I didn't have the luxury of moving on to a new crush so quickly. I didn't dwell on him - but I still can't think of one guy I would honestly date right now. According to a couple people, I constantly hide behind a wall of cold emotionless-ness, in order to keep from getting hurt. They're probably right, but I don't see what's so wrong with that.

Throughout the past few weeks, it seems like every couple I know has broken up, with only one notable exception. People who've been together for years, and people who've been together for a couple months. Seeing all the tears and anger and hurt flowing from my friends, I'm reminded of why I'm so glad that I seal my heart off. In so many cases, a relationship is just not worth the trouble. I'm not saying that I never want to fall in love, because that would be swell, but as of now, I'm so glad that I'm not a romantic. It's much easier to live in reality than to dream about finding a movie-quality love.

For Linda:

"Jack and Kate went up the hill, Kate came down with Sawyer because she's promiscuous."

Beautiful.

Some Recent Findings

DRINK: Diet Coke over crushy ice
OMELET: Patys (Cheddar cheese, tomatos, avocado, bacon)
MOVIE: Confessons of a Shopaholic (can I please be Isla Fisher now?)
WORKOUT: Stage combat classes (a pain in the ass... literally... but I love 'em)
PLACE TO JOG: Griffith Park
SAD FAREWELL: Late Night with Conan O'Brien
JOYFUL FAREWELL: This hangnail I've been nursing for a week
MANTRA: Stay out of it. It's not your business.
SONG: "Congratulations" by Blue October (recommended by my friend Beth... spectacular)
TV COUNTDOWN: Parks and Recreation
BOOK: Mock Stars, by Jon Wenzel
FASHION INSPIRATION: 60s girl bands
FEELING: Hope... deep hope

Our only friend is chaos.

So I saw the Groundlings show Enter the Sunday on, uh, Sunday night, and can I just say... HILARIOUS. The Sunday company is technically a step down from the official Groundlings company, but honestly, these guys were great anyway. There were some really amazing sketches (a couple of them would've easily fit right into any SNL lineup - "The Re-Enactors," which was about these two dudes cast in an E! True Hollywood Story reenactment clip of Charles in Charge, "Audition," which flawlessly combined abysmal tap-dancing and ill-fitting metallic spandex, "Snacks," which featured this really hot, hilarious guy and was about this really hot hilarious guy attempting to steal snacks at a company meeting (way funnier than it sounds, trust me), and "Anomalies of the Unknown," which absolutely defies description so I will leave you with these two choice phrases: SASQUATCH! and DEFALCO BROTHERS DISCOUNT CAR STEREOS! - among them). Big kudos to Nick Paonessa, Taran Killam, and Jennifer Smedley, all of whom made me laugh like a crazy person.

Also, ricocheting offa that, can I rant for a moment?

People who dismiss comedy and comedy fans as being "unintelligent" or "dumb" and who cling to films like, IDK, Atonement or Garden State, are getting on my last nerve. Friggin' a, you guys. I find that so sincerely irritating. For one thing, I'm of the opinion that it's way harder to write great comedy than great drama (and this is coming from someone who has attempted both). There are so many ways to tell a story about love and war and death and tuberculosis, though not all of them work very well (I'm looking at you, Moulin Rouge - a movie which I will always dislike, no matter how many moony teenage girls tell me I should revere it), but within comedy, you're kinda limited - not by the boundaries of reality, like with most dramas, but by what people before you have done. It's okay for a filmmaker to blatantly rip off Shakespeare or Chaucer or Proust, but if something you're writing veers too close to a Monty Python or Mr. Show piece, it just looks transparent rather than artsy.

I don't begrudge great dramatic writers or performers (I would pay $10 plus popcorn to watch Laura Linney eat a cheese sandwich on film - get Daniel Day-Lewis in there with a piece of pizza and I'd probably see it twice), but enjoying dramas doesn't make one any more intelligent than someone who really just loves comedy! Ugh. This is all really in response to an argument I had the other day (which prompted me to go watch Season 1 of UCB, peppered with some Arrested Development and Human Giant just for good measure) with this really pretentious girl who was talking about how comedies are all so "low-brow" and how she "doesn't even like to watch films that are set before 1900," which I just find so obnoxious... but that's another story. Yeah, comedy can be gloriously low-brow, but you really have to be smart to excel at writing it. Thank you, Dane Cook and Larry the Cable Guy, for perpetuating the stereotype that all comedians are boorish d-bags. Y'all make people like Tina and the guys from Stella and all the marvelous people who've come out of Second City and UCB and Groundlings and iO look super lame.

So in conclusion: Films that are willfully obtuse to the point of just seeming silly, i.e. Synedoche, New York, and movies that attempt to be highbrow for Middle America, like The Other Boleyn Girl, sorta prove that drama =/= class; also, while Judd Apatow and Ben Stiller may not have mantels stacked three-deep with Oscars, you know what they do have? Money. Gobs and gobs of it. (I want to make a pun about Will Arnett also having Gobs of money, but my brain isn't really in top form at the moment, so fill in your own here: ________________________.) People like to laugh, and there's more to creating good comedy than meets the eye. Also, I'm a mega-nerd. Geez. I swear I'm more fun than this in real life, I just needed to get this rant off my chest.

Incredibad!

Yeah. Brown. It's temporary and weird.

In other news, The Lonely Island's new album has been in heavy rotation on my iPod for the past few days (along with Congratulations by Blue October - possibly one of the most beautiful songs I've ever heard.) and it is G-E-N-I-U-S. I think we've all heard Dick in a Box, Lazy Sunday, and Jizz in my Pants by now, but Punch You in the Jeans and Sax Man? Pure brilliance. Also, I'm On A Boat. The end.

Yeah, no real content to this blog, just a photo and some fangirling. More later...

When Bruce Willis was dead at the end of Sixth Sense, I....

So check out those sunglasses. Look familiar? No?

Go here. Watch the video. Now do they look familiar? These are the same glasses Andy Samberg is wearing. I'm such a dork, but when I first saw that video, I had to have those. My friend Mandy found them online, and now we're glasses twins! Fabulous!

(Top: Ella Moss. Cardigan: Target. Jeans: Calvin Klein. Shoes: You can't see 'em, but strappy Steve Madden sandals. Glasses: 80spurple.)

Something else worth sharing: Seth Meyers on Late Night with Conan O'Brien! Now, for those of you who don't know me, I have a huge crush on this dude. Massive. I don't know what it is - the disarming smile, the fact that he's not only hilarious on Weekend Update but is also the head writer of the show, all of his travel stories that he tells on talk shows, the fact that he can wear a baseball cap without looking like a tool (which, as a pretty faithful Dodgers fan, is sort of a must for any potential boyfriend of mine. Granted, Seth prefers the Red Sox, but I can deal with that.) - but I have found myself totally crushing on him over the past few months. This interview last night, however, took the adoration to massive levels:



I swear, I think I was meant to be Amy Poehler in another life - he and Will Arnett are constantly fighting for the position of my #1 celebrity crush.

Okay, gotta run. Adios, y'all!

Failboat, Captain Alex!

Okay, two posts in one day? Crazy. What is this. Consider yourselves veeeeery lucky.

Anyway, this is not an outfit post, though it looks like one. It does, however, have to do with the outfit I wore today:



So I need to do laundry. As I was telling Tori the other day, I love those accidents where you put on whatever you have that's clean and end up looking more stylish than usual. I pulled out this outfit this morning and while I wasn't really bowled over by it, I left the house feeling kinda cute. The cardigan, the blouse, the belt - I hadn't worn any of them in a while, and it was just cool enough outside to warrant said cardigan. The blouse, I might add, is kinda see-through. Not completely transparent, but take off the cardigan and it looks a tad immodest.

So. Uh. I don't know what the weather's like where y'all live, but in LA, it can get a little warm during February, a fact which I conveniently forgot about while getting dressed this morning. So by mid-morning, I was kinda hot. Let's imagine this as a game show question, shall we?

You're in a stats lecture and you find yourself starting to get immoderately hot due to your two layers of clothing and your professor's constant need to have the heat running even when it's in the high 70s outside. Do you:

A) Remove your cardigan and reveal to the classroom that your shirt is kinda see-through, or
B) Continue to sweat like a racehorse?

If you answered A, you're a bolder girl than I. By the time I got home and could change, I felt like I had a fever of 110. It was kind of terrible.

You know... I'm just classy like that.

Blouse: Anthropologie
Cardigan: Thrifted
Jeans: Macy's? Nordstrom? I got them in ninth grade, I don't remember...
Shoes: I HAVE NO IDEA
Belt: Target

25 Things About Me.

Because this has been going around Facebook like the bubonic plague (if Facebook were the Dark Ages), here are 25 supposedly "random" facts about me. This list is almost completely different from the one I posted on my own Facebook, but that's cool too. Enjoy.


1. I am irrationally terrified of elevators. I would honestly rather take ten flights of stairs than a 30-second elevator ride. My palms get sweaty and my stomach hurts if a character in a TV show or movie I'm watching gets into an elevator. I'm considering actually getting therapy for this.

2. I give really good high-fives. Do not high-five me unless you want your palm to tingle for the next two minutes.

3. I have never broken a bone, which I find unbelievable. I am a complete klutz and I don't know how I have managed to stay unbroken this long. I think it's all the milk I drink. My bones must be made out of steel by now.

4. I don't like the phone. It makes me nervous because I communicate more with my body than with my voice. I also pick up cues from other people more accurately with body language than verbal language.

5. I would love to play Giselle from Enchanted at Disneyland. I count her as a legit princess. "That's How You Know" was my ringtone for the better part of '08.

6. When I was little, I was scared to sing the line "the old man is snoring" in the "It's raining, it's pouring" song. I would only sing that song if I could change that line to "the raccoons are snoring." Also, from the time I was 6 to my 10th birthday, I really really wanted to be an mortician. Not joking.

7. Spring is my favorite season. I wish it could be spring all year round - I love it so much I don't even think I would need the other seasons to help me realize (or remember) how much I love it. Should heaven exist, and should I go there, it will be springtime in southern California, always.

8. My theme song is "A Better Son/Daughter" by Rilo Kiley. It was bestowed on me by my buddy Ally and I have yet to find another song on the planet that is more perfect in describing who I am.

9. In second grade, I got a concussion from swinging around on the metal bars at my school's playground. The checkups and medical care that resulted from this is what made my parents realize I had terrible eyesight and really, really needed glasses.

10. My biggest pet peeve is when people use the phrase "chai tea." "Chai" means tea in Russian, so you're basically just saying "Tea tea," which is thoroughly redundant and ANNOYING. Lesson for the day, y'all!

11. When I grow up, I hope to become the charismatic embodiment of Tina Fey, possess about 1/100th of the acting chops that Laura Linney houses, be as graceful and all-around lovely as Jackie Kennedy once was, have Bette Midler play my mother in what will be the eventual Lifetime original movie based on my life, and one day own an apartment as cool as Mary Richards's. THIS WILL HAPPEN.

12. I think socks are an invention of the retail industry that should be done away with. I would rather live in a world without socks.

13. Also, I have been known to go out wearing two different flip-flops because I can never seem to find a matching pair. A little sad? Perhaps.

14. I save things I need to remember in text messages under the "drafts" section of my phone. It's pretty handy, especially because I almost always tend to forget things 3 seconds or less after they enter my brain.

15. There is nothing I love more than reading through a big stack of play scripts. The Samuel French bookshops are mecca for me. I try to make regular pilgrimages.

16. I hate - beyond hate - math and science, and I would much rather sit through English class than be subjected to the torture of solving math problems, or balancing equations and doing experiments, even though I'm fairly good at both.

17. Whole Foods' turkey-bacon-spinach sandwich with sundried tomato spread, a pomegranate Izze, and a lemon bar = my meal of choice. I try to eat at least one on a weekly basis.

18. I had a prolonged, very nasty feud with my junior high art teacher. I hated her and she hated me, but I was very, very good at drawing and painting and writing (wish I hadn't let art go) so she had to keep me in her advanced art class, as well as on the newspaper and yearbook staffs. At the end of eighth grade, she conveniently "forgot" to enter this really nice painting I had done in the county fair, despite the fact that it was the best thing I had ever done. I could not stand that woman and still have bad memories of her class.

19. I can't go outside in the daytime without sunglasses. Haven't done so since I was 11 (my glasses back then had Transitions lenses, and when I got contacts, my optometrist told me to wear sunglasses home that day... I just never stopped.) I always have at least one pair of sunglasses with me when I leave the house.

20. I saw Mamma Mia five times in theaters. One of these was the sing-a-long version. I've seen the Broadway show twice. I pop in the DVD every time I'm having a bad day. I have no shame in admitting any of this. Deal with it.

21. Every human being that I'm related to in the world lives within a two hour radius of either Los Angeles, California, or St. Petersburg, Russia.

22. I have a strange love for commercials. When I was little I used to run in front of the TV when they would come on, sit about a foot away from the screen, sing along to the jingles and then go play again when the television program would come back on. Because of DVR, I don't watch them as much. And that makes me sad.

23. I will only go on Haunted Mansion at Disneyland when it is the holiday version. I don't mind the version they have the rest of the year, but it's not worth the line wait time for me. Haunted Mansion Holiday is. Go figure.

24. I was president of the student council in eighth grade. I won the election by getting the entire student body to stand up, sit down, stand back up, and sit back down, after which I pointed out that I had just taken command of the whole school in under 30 seconds, so imagine what I could do with a whole year. It was pretty cool.

25. I am love. I am light. I am abundance. And so are you, you gorgeous creatures!

well, let's try this again.

'Kay, so everyone I know is making one of these. Frankly, I am a Livejournal purist and can never keep up a blog outside of there (I tried here twice in 2008), but why not?

Anyway, for those who don't know me, I'm Alex. In many ways, I'm pretty boring, but I sometimes do interesting stuff that is usually related to the acting industry and showbiz as a whole. You'll read more about that in coming posts. Maybe. If I don't get bored with this first. Essentially, I'm just your average latte-drinking hybrid-driving J. Crew-wearing Blackberry-owning Obama-supporting LA kid. I'm Russian and redheaded and a fan of improv & sketch comedy and the people who excel at it. I love Seth Meyers and Will Arnett and Lee Pace and Jon Hamm and Tina Fey and Amy Poehler and Jenny Lewis and Cate Blanchett. I don't love vapid TV (which means there will probably not be any gushy Gossip Girl recap posts, sorry) and cold weather and people who are pretentious but uninformed and Sarah Palin. Like I said, pretty average.

I don't consider myself a fashionista or even very adventurous with the clothing I wear (although I would love to dress like Chuck from Pushing Daisies every day, let's face it, this is southern California and it just kinda looks weird and overdone to be so constantly put-together, so I usually end up looking like an amalgam of Stacy London and Amy Poehler), so I probably won't make very many outfit posts, but I do like to occasionally gush about a sweet purchase. Actually, I just ordered these amazing sunglasses today. I look forward to receiving, photographing, and then proceeding to rock them for you all. Also, I watch a lot of TV, so you'll probably see lots of posts about that... more specifically, a lot of posts about 30 Rock interspersed with a few other rhapsodical "If only [insert title of show here] hadn't been prematurely canceled..." ramblings. Oh, and I love MSNBC, particularly Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow, though I will occasionally switch it up with CNN since I have a bangin' newscrush on Anderson Cooper. Hooray for the liberal media elite, y/y? Yes.

All right. I'd love to talk more about myself (har har) but there are burgers on the grill and I am starving. Lemon out.